Friday, January 8, 2016

8th of 2016

2016 is on it's 8th day and I got to reflect how this year has been by far for me. Hmm. So-so, I think? I honestly feel like I'm at the borderline of that I-don't-want-to-care and that I-can't-help-it-I-fucking-do-care state. Unbelievable. This phase in my life is something undescribable. I can feel the worst pressure I had by far, if my memory serves me well. It's too much of a hassle to overthink about these fucking aspects in my own dear life and all that's going on during this 22-almost-23 (hah!) phase, but what can I do? I have grown accustomed to the thought of remaining my calm and staying positive even if it feels like a kick in my own ass. I've learned to build stronger walls, I guess, but I'm not sure I got enough of what it takes to be a survivor for this year. It gave me a tough start, but so what? I am tough (not sure at this moment if this is a statement or merely a self-booster I would like to muster lol)

I feel weak lately. I'm not much of a coffee person, so I'm pretty much sure that this is not something that a simple caffeine fix could mend (whutttss? Haha!) And oh I just suddenly thought! This day marks something that used to mean a lot to me before. This is a serious-yet-funny indication (and a subtle proclamation that hey past is past okay) of how things can turn all its way around in just a short span of time. And now that person in-connection to this specific date means nothing but nuts to me lol why do I even bother to mention that here oh well yeah I just thought so. Hmm. So there. I guess what I'm trying to point out here is that that my personal compass is not directed towards anything in the past. I wanna work things out for things that's bound ahead of me. That's all. 

2016, maybe I'm not ready for you, but let's do this!


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